Wednesday, 30 July 2014

Whiskey Reviews: So I need a game to play, what's best?

A famous person once said; "Do you want to play a game?" Maybe they said that. Maybe they were fictional, not famous. The point is that there's a lot of games out of there and it's hard to pick something to play so I thought why not take a page from some gaming publications and do a what's what of each genre as a kind of quick reference of what's worth playing.

So without further ado here's the list of games worth playing from each genre, a list of which has been lifted directly from Wikipedia.

Whiskey Retro Reviews: Mega Man XYZ

Platform: SNES
Release Date: 17 December 1993
Developer: Capcom
Publisher: Capcom
Where to get it:
Price: Around £30

Mega Man is a gaming icon but in his homeland he's called Rockman. How cool of a name is Rockman? The series has a reputation for its difficulty these days but many other of the series incredible innovations have been overlooked through time. Mega Man was one of the first games to feature a stage select menu that wasn't some hidden cheat or debug menu function, it has themed bosses with their own stages and weapons that you take for yourself after defeating them. Mega Man cemented itself right from the beginning as a series that gets things right, even the new things that other games aren't necessarily getting wrong but aren't doing very well or interestingly.
Then along comes the Super Nintendo (SNES), with a glorious 16-bits of pure gaming power and a sound chip that makes Mozart sound like the heavenly sharting of the most beautiful angels you can imagine. The SNES is to the NES what sliced bread is to regular bread. With the improvements of the SNES, Capcom knew they needed something new for Mega Man; they knew they had to step up to the challenge of the day and once more innovate in a well now relatively well established market.

Friday, 25 July 2014

Whiskey Knight Reviews: Shovel Knight

Platform: PC
Release Date: 26 June 2014
Developer: Yacht Club Games
Publisher: Yacht Club Games
Where to get it: Steam
Price: Around £10.99

Shovel Knight. What a guy. He's a knight with a shovel. He shovels things and does knight stuff. Shovel Knight you magnificent bastard.

This is a game that does exactly what it says on the tin; Shovel Knight. You need the title and a screenshot to work out everything you need to know. It's an old-school new-school faux-retro platformer in which you wander around a fantastical world on a quest to save your girlfriend, Shield Knight.

Thursday, 24 July 2014

Whiskey Retro Reviews: Super Mario Land 2 - A Fistful Of Dollars

Platform: Gameboy
Release Date: 28 January 1993
Developer: Nintendo R&D1
Publisher: Nintendo
Where to get it: ebay
Price: Around £5 unboxed, £20+ boxed

Today we delve back into the murky peasoup and pixels world of the Gameboy for a look at one of, if not the finest title on the invincible handheld. So lets jump back in time to the early 90's and leave the rose tinted glasses at home.

Wednesday, 23 July 2014

Whiskey Reviews: The Way The Cookie Crumbles (Destiny)

Platform: Xbox One
Release Date: 23 July 2014 (for the Xbox One beta)
Developer: Bungie
Publisher: Activision
Where to get it: All over the place
Price: Preordering the game

Please note this is a review of the beta release of Destiny and as such the information and opinions presented below are subject to change with the final product.

Lets start by clearing the air, a lot of people have been bandying about the term MMO to refer to Destiny and they're wrong. There's other people in the game, on the same map, fighting the same enemies but it's not massively multiplayer. Unless you think six people is a massive crowd. In which case, you're wrong.
So what is it? A first person shooter with social hub towns and spontaneous cooperative play with random people who just happen to have been loaded onto the same instance of the map as you. Oh, and there's a bit where you get to shoot each other but we'll get to that in a minute.

Tuesday, 8 July 2014

Whiskey Reviews: The averagely sized and tempered Wolf Among Us

Platform: PC
Release Date: 11 October 2013 (final episode released 8 July 2014)
Developer: Telltale Games
Publisher: Telltale Games
Where to get it: Steam
Price: £18.99

Reviewing a game like this without spoilers is practically impossible so when I say I'm about to start by talking about the ending you're probably wondering why. Well, that's because the ending is a motherfucking advertisement. I am not joking. Final scene, curtains fall, credits roll and "Buy our books." pops up on screen. It's like a 12 hour kinky sex session comes to a close, you're knackered and reach for a cigarette and Joe Camel (Old Camel for those who prefer the official name) jumps out of the fucking closet and dickpunches you. You feel betrayed, appalled and just plain disappointed with the realisation that you agonised over hundreds of choices and situations, made snap judgements and what for? A goddamn shill, that's what.
The Walking Dead games don't try to shove a Robert Kirkman graphic novel into your hands when you're done with them so why do Telltale feel the need to do it here? Is it because TWAU isn't a TV show yet? Why Carl?

Okay, I've got that out of my system. On to the actual review: